The Big Questions

by Alice

Scene: Mum sorting laundry, Bert watching Shrek 3

Bert: “Muuum…?”

Mum: “Mm-hmm?”

Bert: “You know when you have a baby?”

Mum [uh-oh, here it comes]: “Yup.”

Bert: “You know you have special cuddles?”

Mum: “Uh-huh.”

Bert: “How do you know which cuddles are the special ones?”

Mum: “Well, there are things that will become an awful lot clearer to you when you’re older. But…

…Let me reassure you that no cuddles you give now will result in babies.”